Texts From Last Night

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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i must have dtf stamped on my forehead

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  (919): i must have dtf stamped on my forehead http://tfl.nu/gk7r
  Replies (41) Good night (2834) Bad night (647)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I have one thing to say: spongebath.

  (1-781): View more from Massachusetts

  I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.

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  (781): I have one thing to say: spongebath. (1-781): I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all. http://tfl.nu/ojs2
  Replies (4) Good night (572) Bad night (2421)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.

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  (770): She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut. http://tfl.nu/onts
  Replies (29) Good night (5652) Bad night (1202)
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  (415): View more from California

  He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.

  (650): View more from California

  .......................................

  (415): View more from California

  My thoughts exactly.

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  (415): He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic. (650): ....................................... (415): My thoughts exactly. http://tfl.nu/05rl
  Replies (6) Good night (957) Bad night (2947)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I will never swim in a flooded basement again..

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  (217): I will never swim in a flooded basement again.. http://tfl.nu/1bcg
  Replies (7) Good night (1525) Bad night (2879)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?

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  (917): I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really? http://tfl.nu/2oxm
  Replies (15) Good night (1039) Bad night (4937)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.

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  (662): Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth. http://tfl.nu/exim
  Replies (6) Good night (2707) Bad night (938)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook

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  (419): I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook http://tfl.nu/40z7
  Replies (25) Good night (2647) Bad night (676)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...

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  (207): Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other... http://tfl.nu/529q
  Replies (6) Good night (2312) Bad night (499)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.

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  (602): All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina. http://tfl.nu/kqy9
  Replies (4) Good night (1218) Bad night (416)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there

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  (801): Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there http://tfl.nu/7057
  Replies (3) Good night (451) Bad night (299)
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  (707): View more from California

  The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".

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  (707): The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny". http://tfl.nu/ox7j
  Replies (3) Good night (491) Bad night (532)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.

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  (970): My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment. http://tfl.nu/pqim
  Replies (0) Good night (551) Bad night (174)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.

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  (713): Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application. http://tfl.nu/jvuq
  Replies (5) Good night (219) Bad night (586)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.

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  (304): He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete. http://tfl.nu/4eka
  Replies (1) Good night (785) Bad night (232)

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