that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
There r osticjed everywhere
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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