and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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