Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
