i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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