It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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