we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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