I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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