It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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