Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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