Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize