Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
They took my balls.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
we should paint friendship bongs
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
