Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
