I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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