that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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