There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
