# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
