I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
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