if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Randomize
