the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
This beer is not sobering me up at all
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
