He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
