Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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