I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
