Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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