Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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