take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
is wine microwaveable?
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
