dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
