Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
