You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
