just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Randomize
