I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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