I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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