How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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