yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
