Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
