I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
