so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
