it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I just gargled with NyQuil
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize