I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize