its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I think people are normalizing furries
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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