And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
