Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
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