Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
someone get that fucking seahorse.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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