that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
