I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
But theres a keg here and me gusta
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
