whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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