she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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