bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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