I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
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the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
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I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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