Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
