other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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