I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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